1 star (out of 4)
Wow, is this ever a bad movie.
Nicholas Cage opens with one of those godawful voice-overs, explaining all the rules he mastered to become a super-duper, top-secret hit man. Then he hires as his right-hand man a skeevy pickpocket. Then he tells the skeeve where he lives. Then he falls in love with a deaf-mute pharmacist. Then he confesses to the skeeve that he is indeed a super-duper hit man. Then he prepares the skeeve for this career path by teaching him to fire a pistol at watermelons. Finally, Cage dons his black leather pants for the closing shoot-’em-up.
(I like to picture Cage in his trailer, thinking: Wow, this picture is a real mutt – only the leather pants can salvage it.)
There is absolutely nothing worthwhile about this movie. It’s dark (not in the good way); the pharmacist is the only remotely likeable character; and the action scenes are workmanlike at best. The fact that is was the top box-office draw during its opening weekend speaks volumes about the state of Hollywood.